I refrain from spanking my boys. They are well-behaved and for now (at least) I am able to get them back in line with stern words or the occasional time-out.
But this evening, after a perilous situation involving the hot stove, Ant refused to listen when I verbally corrected him – twice. So in order to drive the very important point home, I spanked his hand. It was the first time I had ever done this. Two quick taps, with not much force, but oh my gosh — the pain it caused was unspeakable.
First of all, Ant gasped in surprise and then he cried in a way that I have never, ever heard before… like his heart was breaking. He held that poor little hand, cradled it to his chest, and plopped down on the floor in dismay.
And then there was Bean. He immediately fled to his brother’s side and put one arm around Ant’s shoulders. The other hand he used to pat the baby and rub that offending hand. Bean glared at me, near tears himself, and demanded in a shaky voice: “Don’t hit him, Mommy!”
Which all of the above then left me feeling like the heel of someone’s shoe. After all, I am the one always preaching about “we don’t hit” when I try to break up the boys’ battles with each other. It was a snap decision to spank Ant when he didn’t listen. The only reason I did it was because it was a safety issue, and he was not heeding to my verbal reprimands. I tried to explain this to Bean, but he sided with his brother and they became a united brick wall, shutting me out. Barriers.
Soon, Ant did stop crying and it seemed then (and only then) is when Bean came around too. They quit being angry with me and went back to their playtime easily enough. But it just made me realize why I have a “no spanking” policy right now. It just seems like it causes more pain (and not even physical pain) than anything else.
I will have to admit though, the issue with the hot stove was completely dead after this fiasco, and Ant went nowhere near it for the rest of the evening. Perhaps the “spanking” was at least good for that….
